james debate
james debate

Tuesday, 21 August 2007

A tip for all the readers: sometimes to help those you truly care about you must be willing to let your actions go unnoticed, unappreciated and unrewarded.

I didn't want to write about this but I have had too many worried friends asking me about it so here goes: I have an old friend who has been stalking me as of late, in fact shes probably reading this now because shes been getting more and more obsessed. I sympathise with her, and indeed I try to be a good friend but she seems to have lost touch with reality recently and blown a fuse, sending me a long line of texts which alternate between adoration and hatred. This is why i have cut her out for the past few weeks, just so there is no confusion.

It has not been easy to move on, as everytime i lower my guard she lashes out at me in strange ways, and indeed she has been alientating a number of her friends with her behaviour, particularly those who know her well enough to know to 'read between the lines' as it were, and i have implored many of them to stick with her and make sure shes ok, as i do worry for her health right now. I am grateful that they still seem to care as much as I do and have obliged.

People ask me why do i still care when she seems to have 'little life right now other than to deceive close friends and spread lies about me' (their words not mine!) And there are two answers:
Firstly I know her well enough to know that the way she is acting is just a defense mechanism, and one which hopefully she is not deluded enough to perpetuate and will soon let it lie.
Secondly because things have changed since last term, and she is no longer doing me any damage, thus eliminating any need for me to try and stop her. People who know her know how she is, and indeed it speaks volumes that every one of her friends who talks to me first before judging ends up having litle sympathy for her. In particular i am thankful to one formerly critical friend who had the wisdom and openmindedness to seek the truth, and i would point out to my old friend not to be weird with them just because they know me, they happen to be one of the most genuine friends she has.

Lastly i apologise to all mutual friends who have been dragged into this mess, but i have faith that she will eventually have the decency to cut her losses and just let me go while she still has some dignity left, hopefully before term begins.

thank you all so much for being so supportive of both of us!
x

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